Onward O my soul

This morning I was at the Cathedral for a service of ordination to the priesthood. I was asked to help usher, as were all the postulants in our diocese.

What a spectacular way to inspire those of us that are on our way to someday walking down that aisle. What a way to strike awe into our very souls with the weight of what we are preparing to take on. What a way to celebrate all that is good about our faith in the midst of such turmoil in our church, nation and families.

It was especially poignant to me because the last ordination I was at, I was accompanied by a good friend and fellow aspirant to the priesthood. We sat together in hope and expectation that we would both be there together some day. Here it is 6 months later and I am going on without her because only one of us was approved. Truthfully, it had occurred to me that that might happen, I just didn’t think it would be her that was turned down.

It was strange to see the priests that were part of my discernment process over the last 3 years. Now suddenly I’ve crossed over on my way to being their peer. One beautiful priest in particular made my face split in joy from ear to ear as she processed by me with her thumbs up and mouthing, “Soon it will be your turn.”

It was also a moment for deep sadness. One of those who were ordained is the wife of my ex-rector. (see here) I saw old friends from my old church, some who know I’m gay and some who don’t. I also had the opportunity to greet my ex-rector and his wife. I think part of me thought I’d be able to avoid that, but when I found myself face to face with them, all that was left for me to do was hug them and wish them well.

Someday we will stop all this ridiculous rhetoric about “life-style” and separation. There will come a day when ALL God’s children will sit at the same table, equal, accepted, and belonging because in God’s kingdom, where all is already as it’s meant to be, we already do. At some point we will grow up and realize that our call is to love God first, and love our neighbors as ourselves. So let us feed the hungry, heal the sick, fight the injustice and oppression of those who are weak and powerless in this world. That is the battle I am signing up for and am willing to give my life to and for. And I do it because my Lord did it first. All else is crap. My God is love, no matter how inadequately S/He is sometimes portrayed by those who claim the name of Christian.

To borrow a phrase from my friend’s wise and Godly grandfather, I purpose to journey onward measuring everything by this yardstick, “Is there love in this? If not, I’m done.”
Amen.