Because all Canadians live in igloos, right?
This is for Prof Tina who needs her day of sunshine!
Now that
Q:I have never seen it warm on Canadian TV, so how do the plants grow (
A. We import all plants fully grown and then just sit around and watch them die.
Q:Will I be able to see Polar Bears in the street? (
A: Depends on how much you've been drinking.
Q:I want to walk from
A: Sure, it's only Four thousand miles, take lots of water.
Q:Is it safe to run around in the bushes in
A: So it's true what they say about Swedes.
Q: Are there any ATM's (cash machines) in
A: What, did your last slave die?
Q:Can you give me some information about hippo racing in
A: A-fri-ca is the big triangle shaped continent south of
Q:Which direction is North in
A: Face south and then turn 180 degrees Contact us when you get here and we'll send the rest of the directions.
Q: Can I bring cutlery into
A: Why? Just use your fingers like we do.
Q: Can you send me the Vienna Boys' Choir schedule? (
A : Aus-t ri-a is that quaint little country bordering Ger-man-y, which is...oh forget it. Sure, the Vienna Boys Choir plays every Tuesday night in
straight after the hippo races. Come naked.
Q: Do you have perfume in
A: No, WE don't stink.
Q: I have developed a new product that is the fountain of youth. Where can I sell it in
A: Anywhere significant numbers of Americans gather.
Q: Can you tell me the regions in
A: Yes, gay nightclubs.
Q: Do you celebrate Thanksgiving in
A: Only at Thanksgiving.
Q: Are there supermarkets in
A: No, we are a peaceful civilization of Vegan hunter/gatherers. Milk is illegal.
Q: I have a question about a famous animal in
A: It's called a Moose. They are tall and very violent, eating the brains of anyone walking close to them. You can scare them off by spraying yourself with human urine
before you go out walking.
Q: Will I be able to speak English most places I go? (
A: Yes, but you will have to learn it first.
posted by Zanne @ 8:59 AM
11 comments
11 Comments:
lol, yes the world needs more smartassery!
LMAO... I love it. Thanks for the laugh.
Hootin & hollerin! Too funny!
LMAO! How can people be so utterly stupid?!?!
[giggle]
Thanks for the laughs. It reminds me of my favorite tourist question from Crater Lake (we kept lists) - "When do the deer turn into elk?"
Oh Merryn...Probably right after the Hippo Races!
This was too funny!
Zanne-I am barely able to write this response I am laughing so hard. Thank you for bringing such joy to my day! LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOL
PS. The Winter Olympics are coming to Vancouver? Really? WOW that's amazing!
From one proud and informed Canadian to another. ::)))))::)))
Yankeegirl, amen sistah! (PS are you Canadian by any chance?)
UnB, hey you, glad it made you laugh! Hugs!
Only D, so glad! :D
Sassy, ah, now there's the rub...
WenWit, yes, giggle indeed! ;)
Merryn, oh help me people!!!!
Gunfighter, yes I know, but then there are people like--an American who can sing my national anthem--and my faith is restored!
Claire Joy, roflmao!
Prof Tina, actually I'm not sure if the Olympics really are being held in Vancouver, but if they are it's definitely the winter ones because, like you know, we only have cold wintry weather in Canada! ;)
I love Canada and Canadians! These are brilliant and prove, once again, that we Americans are too stupid to realize how really stupid we are. One day, I must emigrate to Canada. I want to be smart and funny again.
JMK, hey one day maybe we can all emigrate to Canada--and just so you know, you ARE smart and funny! :D
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